Sean has hit the nail on the head, and I'll go a little bit further by saying that I think it's very important to keep in mind that things you see on TV do not reflect the actual culture with 100% accuracy. I have a few Japanese friends who have never lived outside Japan, and while they are big fans of Hard Gay, whenever I discuss my gay friend in America wanting to marry his boyfriend, they become very, very uncomfortable. They keep assuring me not to worry, that my friend will "find a good wife" someday.
I say this only because I have made the mistake of taking my own cultural assumptions and using them to laminate over another culture. For instance, if I see two junior high school boys on the train holding hands, I might think," Oh, how cute! See, Japan is accepting of gays!" In reality, these boys are just friends, and would not consider themselves gay (or interested in men, even if they were.) Holding hands is a Western sign of romantic connection-in Japan, it can just as easily be an innocence show of friendly affection. (That said, a guy and a girl holding hands sends HUGE signals.)
Studying and comparing cultures is a big passion of mine, but there's a huge danger in asking if Japan is "accepting" of gays, because we define "accepting" through Western standards.
Is there violence against gays here? No. But will there be legalized gay marriage in Japan within the next 50 years? I give it about a 10% chance... a gay guy I know is actually waiting until his mother dies to move to Canada and marry his boyfriend, because he says the "shock of telling her he was gay would kill her."
Also, and feel free to correct me on this because I am by no means an expert, but as deep in the closet as they are about MALE homosexuality, it seems totally incomprehensible in Japan that a WOMAN could ever be gay. "What? Women.. women have sexual feelings? No, no, they all just want to get married and be mothers." But that's a WHOLE different topic.
